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Proverbs of a 42 yr. old man

Personal suffering. The promise is God will be in us and with us. That we are not alone, not forsaken or abandoned. It's one thing to see other people suffer but when it's your own suffering, it's totally different. I think of Job, that test after losing his children, his wealth and many possessions. He was attacked in his physical body. Job chapter 2 starting in verse 4 Then Satan answered the Lord and said, “Skin for skin! All that a man has he will give for his life. 5 But stretch out your hand and touch his bone and his flesh, and he will curse you to your face.” 6 And the Lord said to Satan, “Behold, he is in your hand; only spare his life.”7 So Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and struck Job with loathsome sores from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head. 8 And he took a piece of broken pottery with which to scrape himself while he sat in the ashes. 9 Then his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die.” 10 But he said to her, “You speak as one of the foolish women would speak. Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips. Amen. Personal suffering is easy not to think about if your someone like me who always is serving others. Since I was a child, I have always served people that need help. My father, my mother, my grandparents, and others I have served in sickness and death as well as through the church and ministry all kinds of service. After a while you become numb to the thought of your own personal suffering. As I watch my own wife now struggle with her ailments and sicknesses, she said something once to me that shook me awake. That I need to take care of myself, because two sick people can't take care of each other. I knew what she meant was for me to make sure I stay healthy and strong to be able to be a caretaker. This personal suffering has become a giant snowball that I try to avoid but age is slowly creeping up on me, and I feel pains all over my body I have never felt before. This makes me think about what people said about Jesus when he was on the Cross. Come with me to Matt. chapter 27 starting in verse 39 The people passing by shouted abuse, shaking their heads in mockery. 40“Look at you now!” they yelled at him. “You said you were going to destroy the Temple and rebuild it in three days. Well then, if you are the Son of God, save yourself and come down from the cross!” 41The leading priests, the teachers of religious law, and the elders also mocked Jesus. 42“He saved others,” they scoffed, “but he can’t save himself! So he is the King of Israel, is he? Let him come down from the cross right now, and we will believe in him! 43He trusted God, so let God rescue him now if he wants him! For he said, ‘I am the Son of God.’” 44Even the revolutionaries who were crucified with him ridiculed him in the same way. Amen. So heartbreaking, notice though what the religious leaders said, he saved others but couldn't save himself. Wow. That hit me hard. I feel like that sometimes. I have no problem saving others but my own personal suffering, who will save me? This is the challenge for all of us as just human beings, in our greatest suffering who will be there for us? Will I be all alone? Will there be anyone left alive that loves me enough to stand by my side in suffering? I had a great prayer and conversation with a brother about this just yesterday. And God spoke through him removing each layer of protection I had built up to protect

myself of the fear of suffering alone. That last layer where I held on to was being left abandoned by wicked people and by uncertain circumstance and chance. To suffer in the most horrible way and have no relief in sight. Where there is no one to help but God himself if He so chose. Then, as I pull away that last layer the LORD Jesus led me to the story of Moses and Gods presence. I felt lead to listen to Moses heart in this question and statement. Exodus 33:15 Then Moses said, “If you don’t personally go with us, don’t make us leave this place. Wow. So aware was Moses of God's presence that he did not want to go on with life if it was without Gods presence. It is the same for us with the Spirit of Christ living in us that we become more aware daily of His Presence with us. Jesus our LORD lives in us so that He can always be with us. When we are all alone and no one to help us in our greatest personal struggle. The LORD Jesus promises to be there for us. Jesus, I will meet you there whenever that day may come knowing that served others and the cost of your life. This so I can know you are with me even in the lonely or lost state in this world. I am found by you through the power of your Holy Spirit. Because you live, I will live. Let me close with Psalms 139: 7-16 I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! 8If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, a you are there. 9If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, 10even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me. 11I could ask the darkness to hide me

and the light around me to become night, 12but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you. 13You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.15You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,

as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.16You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. Amen. Life is worth living even if we are dying. God's love is better than life itself. Don't live another day without Him.

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